On "Eternity"

    As of 2 minutes ago, I just finished a new lyric for this song. Though the music of "Eternity" has remained almost unchanged from its first draft, the lyric has received more rewrites than, I believe, any other moment in the show.

    For much of its life, it was a solo number for the Archer, who delivered it to an otherwise unresponsive Wife, too feeble to interject. The intent was to show the way he needed to leap over himself to justify leaving, highlighting that the decision was a fundamentally self-interested one, rather than a heroic sacrifice. That didn't land, not only because I wasn't able to make the lyric stick the emotional landing, but because the Wife needed to be engaged in the scene. That meant she would need to sing.

    This had the added benefit of giving the Archer something to respond to. His turn to vulnerability is no longer a neurotic shirking of guilt, but the softening of a brave face; it's much more sympathetic. (Even so, a part of me laments the loss. I enjoy a less-than-heroic Archer.) The issue, though, is that now both characters had very few syllables with which to express themselves. I tried to add in a short chorus, but alas, the austere simplicity of the AABA bound me too tightly. So it's been a continual process of futzing with the lyrics down to the morpheme so all the emotional, and dramatic, information gets deployed comprehensibly and artfully. Hence, the long gestation process.

    This is the sort of song my lyric writing professor would call a "hookless wonder". He warned me they were very difficult to pull of, and I believe him a lot more now than I did when he first told me. What he DIDN'T warn me about, though, was how damn hard these were to title. For a while, the song was called "Make Our Moments Stay", and the Archer sang it in both the first and last verse. When I removed it from the first voice, the title no longer seemed to stick. I settled on "Eternity" because "The Potion" felt too removed, and "Eternity" was a word both the Archer and the Wife end up singing. I'm happy to solicit a better title in the comments.

    Here's the new lyric in full. Let's all pray this is the one that sticks, no?

Archer:

DON'T GET UP.

DRINK THIS ELIXIR AND YOU CAN LIVE FOREVER.

THE EMPEROR FORGAVE ME,

AND GAVE ME LIFE AMONG THE STARS.

YOU TAKE THIS NOW.

I'LL JOIN YOU THERE SOMEHOW.

AND THEN ETERNAL LIFE IS OURS.
I'LL SEE TO IT ETERNAL LIFE IS OURS.

Wife:

LIFE AMONG THE STARS, WHAT A MARVEL.

I'M DEEPLY GRATEFUL, BUT I COULD NEVER TAKE THIS.

WHAT GOOD'S ETERNITY,

IF I CAN'T SPEND IT HERE WITH YOU?

I KNOW YOU'VE TRIED.

NOW STAY HERE BY MY SIDE,

AND FILL MY DAYS UNTIL THEY'RE THROUGH.

WE'LL BE TOGETHER 'TILL MY DAYS ARE THROUGH.

Archer:

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M SAYING.

IF I MUST, I WOULD CLIMB ANY MOUNTAIN, CROSS ANY SEA.
IF I MUST, I WOULD HOLD HEAVEN HOSTAGE 'TILL THEY AGREE.

HOWEVER SMALL THE ODDS,

I'D TAKE THEM OVER STANDING BY.

I CAN'T BEAR TO WATCH YOU DIE.

I CAN'T STOP HOPING

THAT SOMEWHERE THERE'S AN ANSWER.

SOME WAY TO BRING YOU BACK.

SOME WAY WE BOTH CAN MAKE IT THROUGH.

I'LL FIND A WAY

TO MAKE OUR MOMENTS STAY,

OR I'LL COME RIGHT BACK HOME TO YOU.

I PROMISE I'LL COME RIGHT BACK HOME TO YOU.

    Singing them back to myself, I just started crying. I think that's as good a sign as any, no?